The double edge sword of Goal Setting

The act of setting goals for our children can be a double-edged sword.

Drawing from our last post we understand that aligning goals with a child's highest priorities/values is not just beneficial; it's essential for fostering their self-belief and ensuring a path towards success and fulfillment. However, when goals are imposed without considering the child's values, it can lead to the opposite effect, diminishing their self-esteem and motivation.

Understanding Your Child's Highest Values

As outlined in our previous post, the cornerstone of this philosophy is the importance of identifying and living by one's highest priorities/values. Each individual, regardless of age, possesses a set of unique values that dictate their perceptions, decisions, and actions. For children, recognising and nurturing these values from an early age can awaken their inner genius, creativity, and innovation, making them more engaged and inspired individuals.

The Power of Value-Aligned Goals

When goals are set in harmony with a child's highest values, they act as powerful motivators. Such goals resonate deeply with the child, sparking a natural drive to achieve them because they are seen as pathways to fulfilling what matters most. This process not only enhances focus and discipline but also instills a sense of achievement and self-worth as the child makes progress towards these personally meaningful objectives.

The Risks of Misaligned Goals

Conversely, setting goals that do not align with the child's values can have detrimental effects on their self-belief. It can lead to frustration, disengagement, and a feeling of inadequacy, as the child struggles to find meaning and joy in the tasks at hand. This misalignment often results in procrastination, resistance, and a lack of motivation, which can be mistakenly interpreted as laziness or defiance. In reality, these behaviors are a child's natural response to feeling misunderstood and unsupported in pursuing what truly matters to them.

Strategies for Value-Centric Goal Setting

-Discover Your Child's Values: Our next post will detail this process. This understanding forms the foundation for setting goals.

-Link Goals to Values: Once you know your child's highest values, craft goals that directly contribute to these areas. The degree of linkage will determine the degree of dedication, focus, resilience, and willpower assigned to its attainment. 


By aligning our children's goals with their highest values, we not only empower them to achieve their aspirations but also contribute to the development of their self-belief and self-worth. 

On the other hand, disregarding their values in this process can lead to negative outcomes, affecting their motivation and self-esteem. 

In our next post, we’ll offer a step-by-step guide to figure out your child's hierarchy of values so that you and your child can set some meaningful objectives for our upcoming Life Skills Academy Easter & Summer Excellence camps.

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